There are times in life when words just don’t seem big enough for what we’re carrying.
Anxiety. Grief. Burnout. Loneliness. Caregiving. A health diagnosis. A big change we didn’t ask for.
Sometimes we know exactly why we’re struggling. Other times, things just feel heavier than they normally do.
Music can sometimes help us carry that heaviness a little differently.
Across more than 35 years of music therapy practice, we have seen this happen in so many different ways. A song can give someone permission to cry. It can slow things down enough to breathe. It can bring back a person, a place or a part of ourselves we haven’t thought about in years.
Sometimes music doesn’t change what is happening at all.
But it changes how we are able to be with it.
The conversation about mental health is changing
For a long time, much of our conversation about mental health focused on what happens once someone is already struggling.
That is still incredibly important. People need good healthcare, therapy and support when they need it.
But there is also more attention now on what helps us before we reach that point: connection, emotional skills, everyday resources and things that help us stay a little steadier through life’s ups and downs.
The World Health Organization describes mental health as a continuum and talks about the importance of strengthening the things that help protect our mental health and resilience.[1]
We prepare for all kinds of things in life. We save money. We build relationships. We exercise because we hope it will help our bodies later.
So we sometimes wonder:
What if we got to know our music before the hard day?
Most of us already use music
You probably already know some of the songs that help you.
Maybe you have one you turn up in the car when you need energy.
Maybe there is music you listen to when you miss someone.
Perhaps you have a song that helps you cry, one that gets you moving, or one that reminds you that you have made it through difficult things before.
Most of us do this without thinking too much about it.
What might happen if we became a little more curious about why certain music helps?
Research continues to show that engaging with music can play a role in emotional regulation, stress, mood and anxiety.[2,3]
But there is something equally important that music therapists learn very quickly:
The music that matters is personal.
There is no one relaxing song.
A piece of music that settles you might drive someone else crazy. A song that makes one person feel safe might bring up a painful memory for another.
That isn’t a problem.
It is actually the point.
Resilience is something we can practice
We sometimes talk about resilience as though we find out whether we have it once something bad happens.
As music therapists, we don’t really think of it that way.
There are things we can notice and strengthen along the way.
You might start by asking yourself:
- What music helps me feel more like myself?
- What helps me settle?
- What gives me energy?
- What helps me think?
- What songs remind me of people, places or strengths I don’t want to forget?
Over time, those answers can become something you can come back to.
Not just a playlist of songs you like.
A personal music resource that you understand a little better.
Years ago, I wrote that “music becomes a soothing agent during critical times.”
We still believe that.
But we would add something now:
We don’t have to wait for the critical time to begin.
We can explore our music now.
We can notice what helps now.
And then, when life becomes difficult, we may have something familiar to reach for.
Mental health isn’t only about getting through hard things.
It is also about staying connected to hope, meaning, other people and ourselves.
Music can be one part of that.
Explore your music with Wellplayed
Wellplayed grew out of more than 35 years of music therapy practice and what we have learned from the people we have had the privilege of working with.
It is a place to explore your own music more intentionally: the music that shapes you, helps you, surprises you and stays with you.
You can reflect, try guided experiences and begin building a music resource you can return to through different parts of your life.
You already have the music. Wellplayed helps you discover more of what you can do with it.
Wellplayed is a self-guided resource and is not a substitute for mental health treatment or professional healthcare.
References
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World Health Organization. Mental health. Updated 2025.
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Peters, V., Bissonnette, J., Nadeau, D., Gauthier-Légaré, A., & Noël, M.-A. (2024). The impact of musicking on emotion regulation: A systematic review and meta-analysis. Psychology of Music, 52(5), 548–568.
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de Witte, M., et al. (2025). Music therapy for the treatment of anxiety: A systematic review with multilevel meta-analyses. eClinicalMedicine, 84, 103293.